World War Z: Kind of a Cheesy Movie

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The cheesiness in “World War Z” was a bit much for me. Yeah, the zombies were pretty creepy. Which is good, because in a zombie movie, I expect the zombies to be disturbing and make you feel a little bit on edge. So I applaud that. My movie watching friend jumped a few times, awesome. The movie wasn’t completely lacking in the jump factor then either. Which is also something that I look for in a movie about zombies taking over the world.

Photo from insidemovies.ew.com

Photo from insidemovies.ew.com

I’m not saying that I didn’t enjoy the movie. I honestly liked it a lot. It was really pretty good. And the zombies were done really well, like I already mentioned. It’s an important part of the movie to me, for obvious reasons. And I haven’t read the book yet so maybe it does a better job at explaining a few things, but I did like the supposed “vaccine” idea. Or I guess it was more like a zombie repellant really. I also loved that the zombies could run. The whole biting thing though was just too creepy even for me. Although they looked like rats or chipmunks, snapping their teeth together, it was just way creepy.

Photo by popwatch.ew.com

Photo by popwatch.ew.com

Maybe I just don’t like people with their teeth sticking out of their mouths like that. Or I just don’t like rodents or people who resemble them. But that’s not really important right now. What I wanted to discuss, or more rant about, was the sappy stuff in the movie.

Like having a happy ending. What the heck is up with that? I mean, seriously. I realize it isn’t even that happy of an ending, but they lead up to something bad happening at the end and it doesn’t. Yeah, it’s a good technique to mislead people and whatever so they don’t just guess what’s going to happen and all but really.

Photo from mashable.com

Photo from mashable.com

What’s with saving everyone though? Instead of having someone get caught, most of the time it’s like they almost get caught but somehow manage to escape, every time. And honestly, every time is unrealistic and not all that entertaining. Sure, it’s kind of a relief when you get kind of scared and the adrenaline is building up but since each time it’s okay, it’s sort of a let down. There aren’t any other emotions in the film, which makes it kind of bleak in my opinion. The zombies had more emotion most of the time then the people it seemed. Seriously, what’s up with that anyways?

Photo by g33kwatch.com

Photo by g33kwatch.com

Maybe it’s just my cynical nature but I’m not sure zombie movies should be quite so positive. Unless it’s “Warm Bodies” or something along that nature. Again, I’ve not yet read the book so I can’t tell how well the movie followed it. I haven’t heard from anyone that has read it as well as seen the movie yet so I am interested in hearing someone’s opinion on that.

Am I the only person who thought this movie had it’s emotions a little off though? I am curious what some non-zombies might have thought about this. Let me know if you have an opinion. Don’t get bit.

The Purge, Take It Or Leave It

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Image from The Purge

Photo by sfcrowsnest.org.uk

Alright, alright. So I started hearing about this movie, “The Purge” a few months ago. Saw some previews and stuff for it and people were freaking out about it. Some wanting to see it, some thinking it was just downright creepy and being a little freaked out about the whole thing.Purge Movie Poster

It was released on June 7, 2013, which was just the other day but I guess it depends on when you see this. Maybe it was like fifty years ago. Who knows. Anyways, it was directed by James DeMonaco, who is known for stuff like “The Negotiator” (1998) and “Assault on Precinct 13” (2005).

Feeling kind of bored, I went and watched it earlier, by myself. I’m not like a loser or something, but I was, as I said, really bored, not just kind of. And not having a lot of friends right now means getting kind of creative sometimes. Or just going to movies and stuff by yourself. Whatever.

The Purge movie

Photo by collider.com

So the movie takes place in like ten or so years in the future where one night a year, well for 12 hours, nothing is illegal and people can do whatever they want. So people go out and murder people and crazy stuff like that and it’s perfectly legal. And of course there are no emergency services available. But the point is this family gets help hostage in their own home for taking in a man who was running away from people who wanted to kill him.

The movie was okay, it’s classified as a horror/sci-fi/thriller. I get the thriller and sci-fi parts of that label, it’s just the horror part that I felt was lacking.

The stars of this film were Ethan Hawke, Lena Headey, and Max Burkholder. Although I’m not sure they were really stars. The acting wasn’t awful but it also wasn’t all that great. Although the villain was kind of hot, not going to lie. Even though he was technically doing something legal according to the laws of  The Purge so maybe he wasn’t really a villain at all. That’s probably kind of debatable.

If you have nothing else to do, you can go see it if you want. I watched it on my own and I was perfectly fine. Maybe it’s just the zombie thing but I didn’t find myself jumping or anything. For me, it was kind of a take it or leave it sort of film. It was kind of thought provoking, the whole idea of a purge once a year is interesting for sure. Not that I would really want to see it in action. Although it would be kind of like letting zombies rule for 12 hours.

That’s my take on “The Purge” so see it if you want. If not, probably not a great loss either. Until next time diary, don’t get bit.

Z

 

Warm Bodies The Movie About Zombie Love

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Photo by movieposterdb.com.

Photo by movieposterdb.com.

Warm Bodies”, have you heard of it? If you are a teenage or preteen girl, that’s most likely answered my question. And if you know a teenage or preteen girl, once again, I have my answer. But just incase you live under a rock and you have not yet heard of “Warm Bodies”, you cave people, you, let me tell you about it.

Photo by sassisamblog.com.

Photo by sassisamblog.com.

It was released February 1, 2013, and is listed as a comedy/horror/romance. Say what? Yeah, apparently it’s all three. Who’d have figured that one out. Except of course, if you paid any attention to my question about teen girls. Because then you might have guessed. It’s sort of like asking about “Twilight” except I actually like this movie. And R, the main zombie guy, yeah he’s really hot. For a fake zombie.

But according to this movie, I can come back to life if I just find someone to love me. Worth looking into if you ask me. Especially if I can find a guy who looks like R. R and Z, we’d totally make a great couple, don’t you think? I do. And honestly, my opinion is really the only thing that matters.

R is played by Nicholas Hoult and then Teresa Palmer plays the girl who I don’t really feel like focusing on right now. I’m sure she’s great too, but really, I like the lesson of this movie. You should love zombies, not kill them. Because we’re pretty great and even if we do eat your boyfriend or something, you can still love us because we can change. It’s been a full 4 days now since I’ve eaten anybody. Trust me, that’s progress.

My fingers feel like they might fall off soon so just watch the movie if you want to watch a zombie movie where the zombies are awesome and people love them and zombies save people. It’s a pretty epic story really. More zombie movies should be like this.

Enjoy the trailer if you want and for now, try not to get bit.

Z

Once Upon A Time…

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Once upon a time, I was alive. And then I died. Great story, I know. But that isn’t all of it. I died, but I didn’t stay dead. At least, not exactly. I’m not like an undead creature, like a vampire who technically died but is still wandering around, giving people some massive hickeys and getting the world’s worst sunburns whenever they step out during the day. No, I’m a different kind of dead and came back to life sort of person. I didn’t come back as something else, I just came back. No blood drinking or bursting into flames, shove a wooden steak through my heart and guess what, I’m still kicking. It’s great, let me tell you. I just don’t die. I got buried twice before they decided to stop wasting the money on funerals. Because even when I was buried, I just had to get dug back up. Fun stuff, right? Not really. But that’s a different story for a different time.

Incase you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m a zombie. You know, the stiff arms and legs, moaning about brains or some nonsense like that. Rotting flesh and a desperate need of some concealer and a spray tan. The not as sexy as Edward Cullen kind of undead creature in other words. Although I wish I sparkled in the sunlight, that would be pretty epic. But I don’t burst into flame either so I guess that’s something to be happy for.

I do get kind of sweaty though, but that’s not something we need to talk about right now. I’m pretty sure that’s just a normal human reaction to heat. Even without a beating heart and full use of my motor skills that I used to have, I’m still human. Kind of.

I’m sure you’re thinking, I know all about zombies, I love “Walking Dead” and it’s such an awesome show. Blah blah blah. Did you know that zombie movies are some of the oldest movies around? Yeah. The first technical zombie movie was released in 1931, directed by Victor Halperin. That movie was “White Zombie.” Some people claim there are older ones though. The original “Frankenstein” movie came out in 1910 and it is about a reanimated corpse. If you couldn’t call Frankenstein’s monster a zombie, I don’t know what you think the definition of a zombie is. By the way, it’s a good movie, even if it is in black and white. But it’s old so I guess I can forgive it for not being with the times. Also, for those of you who don’t know, it’s based off of the book by Mary Shelley, a pretty awesome lady.

White Zombie Movie Poster

Photo from en.wikipedia.org

So as you can see, we zombies aren’t new. We might not be as relevant as Lady Gaga or Jersey Shore, but we’ve been around longer and we’ll probably be around after all those things get boring. Which was pretty much yesterday. Just saying. Dead or not, I do keep up with my pop culture. Some of the obsessions are just a little weird, that’s all. Even Jesus, when you think about it, not to be all religious or anything, is like a zombie in a way. He died, and then he rose from the grave and lived again. Ringing any bells? It’s just a theory mind you, and I’m not bringing it up with my preacher any time soon, but I’m just putting it out there.

Oh, I forgot to introduce myself. You can just call me Z. And I’ll call you, you. Now that we’ve all been introduced, I feel pretty good about this. Feels more, I don’t know, kind of cozy and informal, like we’re buddies or something. I bet you started reading this thinking I was just going to talk about brains and eating brains and biting people for their brains and chasing them down, but I didn’t, at least not too much, but now that you mention it I am a little hungry… Don’t worry though, I’m going to share some survival tips with you. I’m a reformed zombie, like a vegetarian or something. I don’t eat people. It’s been a whole 5 hours since I slipped off the wagon and my sponsor was really proud of me at our meeting about 6 hours ago. By the way, I’m looking for a new sponsor. Just a side note. And we’ll discuss all things zombie. Because we zombies are pretty cool.

Well, that’s all for now folks. Take care and try not to get bit. Unless you want to be a zombie of course.

Z